Recently there was an occasion where I completely lost my
temperament. The Motive for getting into that disposition was compelling.
Anyone in my place had enough reasons to justify the move. But, when I looked
at that day, it seems that I might have been carried away with the
circumstances which finds you in an unlikely situation and you wonder how you
could have been so stupid. I suppose I should be thankful. Being framed for a
transgression is all a part of growing up. “Maturity” was the first word which
struck my mind and left me introspecting for a long time.
What exactly does it mean by maturity?
There are several instances where we use this term. We all understand what it means based on
situation. But, if re-questioned the response is never specific.
Let me narrate you instances where I have encountered people
saying:
Acting childish signifies the absence of maturity.
He is stuffy arrogant, absolute immaturity.
Conceited in their own circumference, not being amicable
connotes immaturity.
Traditionally being childish, stuffy arrogant, being hostile
are all signs of immaturity. Even when
we take “arrogant” and “childish” out of this meaning so that we are left with
‘behave like an adult’, we are still left with a meaning that fails to
represent the true value and quality of the word and its denotation.
Maturity means you are fully developed in some way to fulfil
a role or function. Botanically a fruit
or a vegetable is mature when it is ripe — ready for consumption. When a person
knows the rules of life with norms abided to society, a right speech to a right
person at right place and time is about maturity with human beings. A thin line
between childhood and adulthood - not the factor of age but the state of mind
is maturity.
Maturity is the ability to control ironic emotions such as
anger, annoyance and differences without violence or destruction. Generally,
these emotions get carried away and leaves a bitter tinge embedded with
momentary behaviour too. It is also the capacity to face unpleasantness and
frustration, discomfort and defeat, without complaints or collapse of oneself
too.
Maturity is perseverance, the ability to sweat out a
mission, or a situation in spite of opposition and discouraging setbacks. It is
also unselfishness – responding to the needs of others, often at the expense of
one’s own desires of wishes.
Maturity is an interesting word which is hard to define and
is been revolving around all pleasant traits what the social order is openly
embraced.
To put it into a nutshell, it is a virtue of humility and
modesty. It is a grown up trait that demands great strength to say, “I am
wrong’, ‘I am sorry. And when being
right, the mature person would not say, “I told you so.” It is also the ability
to make decisions and stand by it. It is also dependability to overcome the
crisis.
There are few more false notions attached to maturity. One
in my kinfolk even asked me - “Being serious towards life and with people
around... is maturity. So, I want to be one”. I was dumb stuck when I heard
that. You can’t understand life when you are a fun-loving person. People would
not respect you when are in cheerful and in merry mood.... were few more to add
to the catalogue. All I wanted to say
here was maturity is not the impression that you leave upon others. People
don’t judge on momentary occasions. They judge on long term deeds, repeated
manners and recurrence of your conduct.
Maturity is a long term verdict.
The greatest day in our life is when we take total
responsibility for our attitudes. That's the day we truly grow up and probably
that’s what we call as maturity. It is living life in tranquillity realising
the difference between what can be changed and what needs to accepted. It is
also an attribute to see others just like we ourselves – an objective
evaluation of situation and people.
Growing old is mandatory, growing up is optional. Growing with maturity
is a conscious decision.
Author : Pratima Jagadeesh
She is a HR Professional and works in a MNC at Bangalore.
Her topics of interest are psychology and metaphysics. She is also involved
with Counselling and works for few NGO's.
